domingo, agosto 30, 2009


I really can't understand why everybody is worried about everybody else… Man... I really enjoy those moments when I don't have to say anything; I feel that I’m just being. Fortunately, I don't have to share holy moments with everybody, I couldn't even try to do it because everybody is busy; secretly preparing their paths, and preparing themselves to get the things they've always wanted, or just those things they desire in the moment... and that's ok... I mean... I will love to have the oportunity to do many, many things in my life and since I've learned that you gotta work hard to get the things you want, I've been doing the same thing others do; prepare myself and be sure I build my future in my present. Well... I think that you can do that, but you can also live for the moment and build your life that way... as the "reunion of the free choices that you make", and then you can say that's what you are: "to say yes to one instant is to say yes to all of existence", you can say (and you don't even have to say it you can feel it) you exist, and you existed. Once I heard someone really special for me talking about how in the creation of a better and easier life, things had become more and more complex and complicated, and it's so scaring and sooo true; that made me feel I will like to go to the past and live in the times where people didn't need cell phones, or emails or msn to communicate, and where people were free to exist without getting attached with such unreal things like those who have become so important in people's life (also in mine)... and I desire that, because I feel that I need it; I need to be the reactions from actions to the atraction, and by that I mean all kind of atraction. The one I feel when I like to read about a subject or another, or the one I feel when I wake up and I look through the window, or the one I feel when I like to share what I am or what I think I am with someone. It's just an answer.

When I was younger I used to think that I could plan everything in my entire life, every little detail just by writting it down in a so called "life project"... bullshit... You can even imagine how what you call your life can change in just one second, just by listening one word, just by looking someone's eyes, by seeing what they have to tell you. After having all this thoughts in my mind, and after one amazing and revealing night or two, I realized I was able to communicate without using any words, and not even using body language, (wich I believe its necesarily written as the regular, I mean we have to use words to explain it's not very different, but that's another subject, wich it's also called, so it's language too) until that holy moment I had with that special someone, who made me understand so many things about myself... I start to believe maybe that's what everybody should find someday; in the deep stormy sea of confusion and social relationships people lives, in a corner of that created world there's something real; you are going to meet someone that make you understand so much about yourself (maybe that someone is really you). That's what I've found, and I'm really happy and grateful to that someone. I know sometimes I might feel I need to hear a voice, or read some words; but I'm always going to be sure that I know believe in the holy moments of life because I've enjoy them as they come. I'm really pleased to have in my life the unexpected, and only wait for the surprise, know "I want something good to die for, to make it beautiful to live" those who understand this, are the dreamers; those who believe in life beyond the sensations of the touchable; those who speak to you in your dreams; those amazing characters of my life. Like you.

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